“Dan kesejahteraan semoga dilimpahkan kepadaku. Pada hari kelahiranku, pada hari wafatku. Dan pada hari aku dibangkitkan hidup kembali.” [QS. Maryam (19): 33]
So, finally, here comes the only one day in my life that will be remember forever. It is the day when I was born years ago. During my childhood, I will really waiting for this day to come. This is the most important day in every year of my life. I will be very sad when no one remember it.
But then, as I grew up, somehow, this day is not that important. I keep telling myself, “Keep calm dear me, it is just a bornday!” This day is a reminder for me, that another year has passed. I lost another year to live in this world. It made me think, “What have I done all this time? Did I use my time wisely? Did I benefit enough for people surround me? Did I prepared enough for Jannah?” These are some question that keep ringing in my head. Each and every time of my birthday. I dare not to think that I have wasted all my time for nothing. It scares me.
But, this day also the day where I felt blessed and grateful. I am really grateful for the life I have been living. For who I am today. For being born from a remarkable mom and to the amazing family (Sanrusdi and Somad). I indeed blessed for having families that always support me and friends that always there for me through hard and happy days.
Then, which of the favors of your Lord will you deny? [QS. Ar Rahman]
For today, May 4th 2015, I felt complete. I am sad and happy at the same time. Think of how I have spent years behind and thankful for still being alive until today and being happy, more than any other people out there. I really wish that Allah SWT will always guide me, never leave me behind, along the way until the day I supposed to meet Him. May Allah pour His blessed upon me, my families, and my friends. Aamiin.